STRESS IS IN THE MIND

THE verse from the Bible, “As a man thinketh in his heart so is he,” not only embraces the whole of a our being, but is so comprehensive as to reach out to every condition and circumstance of our life. A man is literally what he thinks, his character being the complete sum of all his thoughts.

As the plant springs from, and could not be without, the seed, so every act of a man springs from the hidden seeds of thought, and could not have appeared without them. This applies equally to those acts called “spontaneous” and “unpremeditated” as to those, which are deliberately executed. These words were written by James Allan.

The mind is the starting point of everything. It leads us to our destiny. Today I want to talk about the topic –“Stress/ Fear is in the mind”, about the causes of stress and tools for handling stress.

 Causes of stress

Now when we enter a situation, we don’t just enter it. We don’t travel light. We bring along with us considerable baggage, every experience and thought that has been stored, both knowingly and unknowingly, in the mind. These thoughts and experiences are so strongly embedded in our psyche that over a period of time they become belief systems. And we look at the world and at situations in our life through these belief systems or filters as they are commonly called. These filters determine how we perceive a situation.

Let me give you an example. A long time ago, I suffered from fear of social rejection. I hated mingling with people. I used to fear striking up conversations with people except very close friends or family. I could not make friends easily. As far as possible, I would try to melt into the background everywhere.

These fears prevented me from taking part in events in my school and college, my fear was due to a belief system in my mind which said “I am ugly. Nobody likes me. People don’t like to talk with me. People will make fun of my appearance” and so on and so forth.

Now during my teenage years, I was indeed very plain looking, short, fat and ugly, with little or no poise and totally ungraceful and clumsy.

Beliefs were set up in my mind due to remarks passed by people about my looks /personality.

My best friend was just the opposite. She seemed to thrive in front of an audience. She loved being the centre of attraction. She was a total extrovert. Her belief system probably told her “I look good, People enjoy my conversations, and everyone loves me, etc.”

Same situation –Social Interaction– Caused stress in one person while not affecting the other one at all.

Similarly, a thief will become highly stressed when he spots a policeman, His belief formed from past experiences tells him that he’ll get into trouble if he is caught by a policeman, irrelevant of the fact  whether he has done something wrong at that point of time  or not. So his first reaction is to flee. However you and I will not be stressed if we come across a policeman since our belief system tells us just the opposite thing – “Policemen do not cause trouble; they protect.”

Same situation – Face to face with Authority– Caused stress in one person while not affecting the other one at all.

People experience so many different types of fear- Fear of social rejection, fear of dark, fear of pain, fear of falling ill, fear of loneliness, fear of staying alone, fear of failure, fear of falling down etc. The list is endless. However what we need to know is that behind each fear is a wrong belief system.

It is important to understand that a situation per se is not stressful; it’s only the precipitating factor. It’s not social interaction which is stressful, but our belief systems, which creates stress. Due to the fact that different people view the same situation through a different set of beliefs, they respond differently in the same situation,

That explains why a certain situation may stress out one person whereas it may not affect another person all.

Belief systems are believed to be formed even before we are born. We start learning and experiencing things right from our mother’s womb and from then on it is a constant learning process. Some beliefs come from parents, some are drilled into us in school by teachers, some come from friends, peers, bosses  etc. some belief systems are even inherited from our parents.

Tools for handling stress: There are 4 tools for handling stress: Replace, Renew, Refuse and Refill

Replace the wrong belief: In order to avoid getting stressed by situations, we need to tackle the root because; we need to identify situations that stress us out, track the belief that is causing the stress and replace that belief with a new one. Remember, belief systems have been learned by us during the course of our life and what has been learned can surely be unlearned.

Stress is in our minds.  No matter whatever you are stressed about, remember there is someone else facing the same situation and they are not stressed.

Renew your mind daily:  Romans 12:2 tells us  “And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God’. Refresh and renew your mind with prayer and meditating on the word of God. As a practice I pray the Mind prayer which Pastor has taught us daily in the morning. It keeps my mind refreshed and keeps me going throughout the day.

Refuse to stack rubbish in your mind: The world is full of people who run around like garbage trucks and try to offload their garbage onto other people. But it is upto us to decide whether to accept or reject the garbage thrown at us. Our mind is not a garbage dump to stack rubbish. The moment someone, no matter who- your parents/friends/teachers, speaks a negative word over you, reject it and release it immediately in the name of Jesus. Don’t allow it fester in your mind and become a belief.

Refill your mind with positive beliefs: During your free time fill your mind with positive beliefs-

I look good, I am unique, I am beautiful, I know my subject, I can speak well on it, I enjoy speaking in public, I can do my job well,  I am in good health, I have everything I need. I will prosper; I am God’s favourite- the apple of his eye. So even if a negative word gets across to you, your mind will hesitate to accept that since there is already a lot of positive belief systems set up in your mind.

Remember, it is easier to establish a positive belief than replace a negative belief with a positive one.

Be alert, use these tools daily and next time when you are facing a situation which is unnerving you   and you are tempted to say “I am stressed” don’t speak it, change the sentence to “I am too blessed to be stressed”